By Heather Lopez

So I was at a Dunkin’ Donuts blogger tasting event yesterday & Jewel Figueras of Jewel’s Fab Life was there. Now, this particular DD was in the habit of playing some great R & B, so Jewel starts dancing in her seat to the music. I tell her that I wish I could just do something like that, but I hold back. She tells me, “Let your hair down.” It was with that one simple sentence that I came to the realization that I had become wound up. Wow! What happened to the girl who used to dance the night away even if I was the only one left on the dance floor, the girl who cracked sarcastic & suggestive jokes whenever I saw fit, the girl opened her mouth even when it got me in trouble….? In becoming a “professional” and business-oriented, I had somehow lost some of my freedom & my personality. I realized that if I were to start the process of letting my hair down, I would excel even faster in business & my life.

Step 1: Breaking Down the Walls

Lately I have been working on becoming a better speaker and about two weeks ago, I was challenged to get in front of a room of women and speak. I began slowly putting myself in a box, by adding in rules or beliefs that limited my ability to do what I wanted. The challenger had me turn my back to the audience and tell the story of how my husband & I met. So I started telling it, and then had to turn around and face the audience to finish the rest of the story. The only thing was that I did not get a chance to finish before I was asked to switch the story & not only that, I had to start gyrating my hips while speaking. This threw me for a loop and I froze up. I began thinking about how the women were hungry for dinner and waiting for me to finish the exercise, and wanting to get it over with. However, I just froze like when you have a pop quiz in school and I had no answers. I finally managed to gyrate away and get a simple story out before we were dismissed for dinner. Aaah, relief!! You’d think I would’ve realized how wound up I had become then, but no, it was yesterday when I was told to let my hair down. The first thing I realized that I had placed myself in a box, contained by walls of rules. I let fear manipulate and control me to the point that I lost a piece of myself. So, the first thing I need to do is to break the walls down.

Step 2: Let My Hair Down, Literally

Most people know me by my profile picture which I use almost everywhere. It’s even on this site for the time being. And many people who have seen me in person, also know me to wear ponytails a lot. Being a mom of two toddlers, wearing a ponytail is the easiest way to do my hair and keeps my hair out of my face.  However, many people prefer me with my hair down, including my husband. I used a Facebook cover photo  for my personal profile that has me with my hair down and slightly blowing in the breeze, which people have complimented. I realized that I started the process of letting my hair down in December, when Tanya Cross chopped off inches of my hair, so that I looked good without much effort at all.  Plus, my husband bought me a new wardrobe for Christmas. So between those things, I began to take better care of myself. Somehow as a mom, I had forgotten how to put myself ahead of others for a change. However, I was informed that my hair transformation would be a two part process, as I still need a keratin treatment to smooth it out. So as you can imagine, three months later my hair is starting to grow out and poof out as well. I have to admit that I have been returning to the ponytails to keep my hair controlled. Fortunately, Tanya will be doing my hair this week in preparation for my new professional pics (and not to mention, my 5th wedding anniversary) this week. You see, my new pics will need me to let my hair down literally as well. I believe that taking care of yourself allows you to feel better about yourself, which boosts your self-esteem and confidence. This boost, in turn, attracts others to you.

Step 3: Practice What I Preach

Okay, I admit, I sooooo guilty of teaching people how to do things for themselves, yet fail to do it for myself. So, in the spirit of my need to practice what I preach, I am committing to let my hair down in my business and my life. I am declaring Fridays here on my blog,  Let Your Hair Down Friday. So after cleaning my house, I am going to reward myself with some pure, unadulterated rants & raves on life & business. On Fridays, the rules don’t apply and I will post what I want, when I want, and about what I want without fear of repercussion.

I believe that when we start to let our hair down, we will enjoy our lives to the full. Just think of how many people out there don’t play by the rules, and people love them for that. Stay tuned for my post later today.

Heather Lopez, aka TheSocial Commerce Mom, specializes in relationship marketing both online andoff.  She is the CEO of Heather LopezEnterprises LLC & the Principal of Heather Lopez Media, where she is responsible for several events, websites, trainings, and services targeting moms and those seeking to market to moms. Heather empowers women to create their own financial freedom through business or blogging so that they may have more time for what they treasure most. She is also a 30-something mom to two rambunctious toddlers and wife to one entrepreneurial-minded husband.  You can connect with Heather @